


The Great Camelot Bake Off

by Onehelluvapilot



Category: Merlin (TV), The Great British Bake Off - Fandom
Genre: Crack, Crack Crossover, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Honestly just ridiculous, M/M, Ridiculous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-02
Updated: 2018-09-02
Packaged: 2019-07-05 18:21:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15869178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onehelluvapilot/pseuds/Onehelluvapilot
Summary: Exactly what the title says





	The Great Camelot Bake Off

It was just Arthur's luck that his station was placed next to Merlin’s, who was the absolutely most infuriating other baker in the tent. It was only week three and he was already ready to brain the fool with one of his own pans. The idiot simply wouldn't shut up.

It didn't help that he was better than Arthur at just about everything; even though he seemed completely hapless half the time, the other half everything seemed to go right. His over-full pots of thick beef stew for filing pastry with never seemed to boil over and his caramel never burned. Arthur was pretty sure he'd seen the stove turn itself off at least once while Merlin had his hands full with other things. He seemed to be a baking wizard, when he wasn't tripping over his own feet and spilling his cake batter all over the other his neighbor.

* * *

 

“So Gwen,” Mel said cheerily, leaning on her work station as the woman pulled a pan of puddings out of the oven. “How does it feel to have half the men in this tent, and there really do seem to be a lot of men this go ‘round, so clearly in love with you?”

“I'm sure they aren't really,” the maid deflected, pushing a lock of hair back behind her ear shyly.

“Nonsense!” Sue argued. “I've been watching that prince Arthur all day and he hasn't taken his eyes off you. And Gwaine brought you that bunch of edible flowers last week!”

“I'm sure it's just because of what you said, that there aren't a lot of women this season. Only me and Morgana.”

“What about Lancelot? He's been such a gentleman, especially with that lemon curd incident. _Sir_ Lancelot, you might call him,” Mel pointed out, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

“He is very handsome,” Gwen agreed reluctantly.

“Ahhh!” Mel gasped. “You hear that Sue? We have a real life romance on this season of the Great British Bake Off.”

“We'll have to see if we get any marriage proposals baked into wedding cakes!” Sue exclaimed. Gwen's cheeks felt as warm as the proofing drawer and turned as rosy as her strawberry jam.

* * *

 

“Bloody hell!” Lancelot cursed, dropping his knife to the cutting board with a clatter.

“Lancelot!” Sue gasped from a station away. “I do believe that's the first swear I've heard out of you!”

“Sorry,” he apologized, looking abashed. “I cut myself.” He had quickly grabbed a dishcloth to cover the wound on his finger from the cameras and potentially squeamish audience.

“Oh dear, is it bad? Will we have to amputate? I can see the headline now; man attacked and horribly mutilated by a carrot cake. Suspect has been taken into custody and eaten.”

“I don't think it's quite that bad,” he replied with a humoring smile despite the pain.

“Let me take a look,” Gaius offered. “Merlin, watch my caramel,” the physician called as he wiped his hands and came over to tend to Lancelot.

He confirmed that Lancelot would indeed keep all his fingers and bandaged up the cuts. Five minutes later, they were both back at work, the younger baker with the addition of some blue tape around two of his fingers. When it came time for judging Mary thought the piping was a bit sloppy, but that it could be forgiven given the circumstances and the excellent flavor of the lavender frosting. A little while later, Sue announced that the star baker of this week had sweat and bled for his bake.

* * *

 

It turned out to be not Gwen who received the first love letter, but rather her brother Elyan. An obscene note about soggy bottoms that could not be repeated in polite company was found pinned to his apron before the Technical Challenge. It didn't help the man's dignity that the recipe they had to make was a berry tart, which meant many discussions of what could happen to your crust if you forwent the blind baking. It wasn't hard to figure out who wrote the note, what with its contents and the way Gwaine came in dead last because he spent the entire challenge making eyes at the baker of his affection. He went home that week, but decided it was worth it when Elyan invited him to come over and taste test his recipe for the next signature bake.

* * *

 

While Merlin didn't exactly grow on Arthur, the man began to find him less intolerable. Which was progress, he guessed. It helped when the baking wizard shared some of his excess fondant when his neighbor realized he had waited too long to cool it sufficiently. That probably saved Arthur that week, and Morgana went home instead, rather bitter, potentially plotting to bake some cyanide into her next almond cake. Congratulating the gangly young man for getting star baker, Arthur patted him on the back and said he wasn't really so bad.

“Does this mean you forgive me for the cake batter incident?” he asked hopefully.

“Not even close.”

“Yeah I thought so.”

* * *

 

Lancelot let himself be eliminated in the semi finals. Guinevere’s showstopper wasn't going well, and he realized that she would be eliminated if he didn't throw the round. He knew she was a better baker than him, better than all of them, and she was so close to the finals when she could prove it once and for all, but it looked like she was going to be sent home before then, just because her proofing drawer had just been set too hot. That didn't seem fair. At the sight of the tears in her eyes and Mel comforting her,  Lancelot “forgot” about his bread in the oven. He wasn't sure how subtle it was, especially when Arthur gave him a solemn nod while he was pulling out his horribly burned loaf. Forfeiting the competition, he knew, also meant forfeiting Gwen. He wasn't blind to the romance that had been budding between her and Arthur for the past few weeks. The Prince was a good man though, much less arrogant than he had been even just ten weeks ago, and would treat her right. Even afford to help her start the bakery she wanted to run.

“You better come to the party,” she ordered, choked up when she hugged him after Mel announced that he was leaving. His own eyes were dry.

“Milady, nothing could keep me away. I promise I'll be there to see you crowned.”

* * *

 

He was. Standing in the front row, just behind the three finalists, he had a great view when Arthur congratulated Gwen first, picking her up and swinging her around in a circle as she kissed him. Merlin stepped back next to Lancelot and elbowed him suggestively.

“Think he would have done that to me if I'd won?” he joked.

“Face it, Merlin, you were never going to win against that woman,” Lancelot replied.

“Man, did you see that wedding cake? Seven layers. Seven. Each one a different flavor with a different type of icing. How was I supposed to compete with that? That woman. I might have magic but she is something else altogether.”

The woman in question broke away from Arthur, finally, when she had to stop kissing to breathe. She was crying, happy crying, as she hugged Merlin and then Lancelot.

“I'm so proud of you,” he said, pressing a light kiss to her forehead. There was flour on it, and his lips left a mark.

Elyan pulled her away to hug before she could reply.

“Wanna go to a pub and drown our sorrows that haven't already been smothered by cake?” Merlin asked jovially.

“Sounds good.” They told Gwaine where they would be in case anyone wanted to come join them later and grabbed a couple more slices of Gwen’s winning bake because it really was a showstopper. Lancelot’s arm ended up slung around Merlin's shoulders, even though neither of them were drunk. Yet.

**Author's Note:**

> Love comments


End file.
